Your Hosts

Terry-Patten Diane Musho Hamilton Sensei Jeff Salzman
Terry Patten Diane Hamilton Jeff Salzman
Ken Wilber

Special Guest Ken Wilber!

Nov 10-13, 2016



There are three ways to approach the mystery of the divine. The first practice is prayer. The second is meditation. And the third, and most important, is conversation. ~Rumi

The endings of life give life’s meanings a chance to show. ~Stephen Jenkinson

Join the Integral Tribe for a 4-day Exploration of Death and Dying

Every spiritual tradition says that we only live fully when we face death as a practice. Some say that awareness of our inevitable death is the basis of the path because it teaches us how to live.

And yet we tend to live in the illusion of immortality, in a superficially positive affirmation of life that is also a subtle “denial of death.” This tends to numb us, and makes us illiterate in regard to the grieving that is such a profound dimension of the fabric of wise human living. It makes it hard to metabolize the many smaller losses that are woven into the fabric of aging, and of illness.

This is why your death is such a wise and uncompromising mentor. And why it can unlock new levels of appreciation for the gift of life, as long as it lasts.

Death twitches my ear. “Live,” he says, “I am coming.” ~Virgil

The Integral Living Room has always been a place for “high play,” and for daring to say the things we usually avoid. It is a place where even the most serious and edgy conversations can also be funny, liberating, and joyful.

In the Integral Living Room, we will “get down” with what the Buddha called the “heavenly messengers” of sickness, old age, and death. Through deep conversations and experiential exercises, we’ll make contact with the ancient and unchanging core of our mortality, as well as the emergent dimensions of the integral consciousness with which we are learning relate to it—and to each other.

Join us at the Integral Living Room for a transformational encounter with the universal teachers, death and dying, this November 10-13.

Refresh your relationship to life and death and love and loss

  • Enter a deep Integral conversation about your mortality.
  • Deepen your capacity to face and learn from loss and grief.
  • Touch into the timeless, deathless nature of who you are.
  • Explore death and dying in four quadrants.
  • Explore how your view of death and dying changes as you develop.
  • Face your losses with smart, deep friends who are also facing theirs.
  • Engage practices in preparing to die, and practice preparing for the death of others.

The Integral Living Room

Thursday, November 10th (7pm) to Sunday, November 13th (1pm) 2016

The Integral Center, Boulder CO


Connect with friends old and new

Connect with friends old and new

See and be seen

See and be seen

Gently guided group processes (introvert friendly!)

Feel the love


Party hearty!

Hang out with Ken Wilber!

Ken Wilber shares his latest ideas—in person


Explore beautiful Boulder, CO

A Message From Your Hosts

The three of us have worked together for over ten years, leading many significant Integral events, including the Integral Institute Seminars of 2004–2007, the Integral Spiritual Experiences of 2009–2012, and the What Next Integral Conference over the New Year’s holiday three years ago.

But nothing has been more fruitful — and fun — as the Integral Living Room gatherings which we’ve conducted in beautiful Boulder Colorado.

As you can see from the description above, we were trying something a little different. Some aspects worked (amazingly!) in all four quadrants. And some things were less successful. That’s the way the creativity of the Kosmos does its thing—by prototyping, getting feedback, refining and trying again. This creative process is how we evolve culture together.

So we’re excited to do it again, to build on what caught fire and to try out some new ideas to make it even better.  We’ve been working with Ken Wilber on new ideas for exploration and discussion — and, wow — the creativity and brilliance has already been electrifying — and just plain way fun!

The Integral Living Room is a gathering we not only want to lead, but attend and enjoy ourselves.  As old friends and collaborators, the three of us found it especially gratifying as we were catalyzed to a whole new level of intimacy, vulnerability and mutual trust.

We hope you can join us for this rare chance to hang out with some very special friends, old and new, in a space that lets us all go as deep and wide as our hearts and minds allow.

Please join us!

Diane, Terry and Jeff

What participants are saying...

There was an amazing immediate safety in the space and a freedom to show up as who I am, not who I make myself up to be. With that layer of my ego set aside, I found myself participating, experiencing and learning much more deeply than I have in any of the conferences I have previously attended.

–Jim Luebbers

Just spending time with Diane, Jeff and Terry is delightful, but to be in practice with seventy-five beautiful souls with shared desires to continue the evolution of Love and Consciousness is a gift beyond measure.

–Shay Pausa

The Integral Living Room is an opportunity to meet your family members from all over the world. It’s beautifully facilitated with plenty of time for open conversation. I left there feeling loved and held and supported, and educated in practical ways.

–Roshana Ariel

I think the Living Room setting is very important for the growth of Integral. I am really glad that Ken could be there.

Get yourself to the Integral Living Room in October! They keep getting better! Here is where Integral is growing Big Heart as well as Big Mind and every one of us matters!

Thank you for the curiosity, inquiry and vulnerability.

–John Mariner

This gathering will restore your hope in the future.

–Rich Tafel

A great experience, especially the interpersonal moments of Integral we-space. This has already helped me in my interactions with my patients.

–Jeffrey L. Tate, MD Psychiatrist

How Loving! What Community! How Healing and Refreshing! How Unique!

I appreciated the chance to actively, personally, effectively dialogue about how to expand integral throughout the culture and embody integral more fully in ourselves in the world, the discussion on how to apply integral to the crises present and ongoing on this planet, and the chance to celebrate and share the mystery, delight, love, challenges, terror, relationship, and exquisite beauty of this existence!

This particular embodiment of the Integral We was the very best integral gathering I have attended, in large part because it was small enough to allow for deep exchange on many levels, with an amazing diversity of personalities, backgrounds, and skills to share.

The Integral Center is a beautiful, functional, diverse, and intimate physical space to dwell in for a few days, (place matters!).

The Presence, in an intimate setting, of Ken Wilber, which allowed for experiencing his heart and compassion and bodhisattva field and the opportunity of a few minutes of direct dialogue with him also made this Integral event unique and I hope will be a feature each time.

It is a much fuller, deeper and altogether different experience being with Ken than simply reading his works or hearing a recording or video.

It is the first integral event I’ve attended that offers the chance to network in a meaningful way, which I trust will be invaluable in my work in chosen fields ongoing. All of this and more makes this the one integral gathering I intend to make each year.

–Thomas (Taom) Heady, Musician, Counselor/Educator/Political Activist

This was my second Integral Living Room and I’m going back for more next October!

I love these evolved people, many traveling here from all over the globe. They are lifelong learners like me, drawn to a weekend filled with passion, connection, and deep friendship… and all of it embedded in evolutionary and integral principles.

–Leila Bruno

I appreciated the opportunity to bring the AQAL map alive in person. Navigating the 1st, 2nd and 3rd person terrain in a supportive container was fantastic.

The Integral Living Room was a creative cauldron of evolutionary potentiality. Theory came to life as the AQAL model was lit up and made real experientially…and we were it! Highly recommended!

–Grant Hunter

Your Hosts

We’re thrilled to announce that Integral pandit extraordinaire Ken Wilber will be joining us in the Integral Living Room! If, like most of us, you have been inspired by Ken’s brilliant insights and writing, you will love the chance to hang out with him in this informal setting. Ken is a delight in person, and will share his latest thinking (including his up-to-the-minute writing on Volume II of the Kosmos Trilogy), answer questions, and schmooze on any topic the group is engaging.

It’s a rare chance to get up close and personal with the man who has sparked the modern integral movement and is still its leading light.

Ken Wilber is the most widely translated academic writer in America, with 25 books, translated into some 30 foreign languages, including the recent Integral Spirituality. Ken is an internationally acknowledged leader and the preeminent scholar of the Integral stage of human development. He is the founder of Integral Institute, Inc. and the co-founder of Integral Life, Inc.

Ken Wilber is a national treasure. —Robert Kegan, Harvard Graduate School of Education
Ken Wilber is one of the most important pioneers in the field of consciousness in this century. I regard him as my mentor. He is a source of inspiration and insight to all of us. —Deepak Chopra, M.D. author of The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success
Ken Wilber is one of the greatest philosophers of this century and arguably the greatest theoretical psychologist of all time. —Roger Walsh, M.D., Ph.D.

Diane Musho Hamilton Sensei is a gifted professional mediator, facilitator, and teacher of Zen and Integral Spirituality. She has been a practitioner of meditation for more than 25 years. Diane facilitates Big Mind Big Heart, a process developed by Genpo Merzel Roshi to help elicit the insights of Zen in Western audiences. She has worked with Ken Wilber and the Integral Institute in Denver, Colorado, since 2004. She is also the co-founder of Two Arrows Zen, a center for Integral and Zen practice in Salt Lake City, Utah with her husband Michael Mugaku Zimmerman.

Diane is a very special person, compassionate, caring and wise. Her facilitation and teaching skills are beyond question. I very much appreciated and recommend her timeless and timely integral zen work. —Lama Surya Das
Diane is a gifted and profound facilitator. Just to be in her field is healing. Her capacity to lead a group is very gentle, and yet she is able to bring out broad perspectives from Big Mind to Deep Shadow. Her work is very transformative. —Marcelo Cardoso

Terry Patten has worked with Ken Wilber and I-I since 2004, and was the senior writer and co-author of the book Integral Life Practice. He created the acclaimed 8-session online course, Integral Spiritual Practice. He writes and coaches, and also speaks and teaches internationally, and he hosts the acclaimed online teleseminar series Beyond Awakening: The Future of Spiritual Practice.

Working with Terry lifts my heart, while strengthening and clarifying the evolutionary impulse within me. If you study with him you will be empowered, uplifted and inspired into your own next level of conscious evolution. —Barbara Marx Hubbard, author of Conscious Evolution
Terry Patten is one of the most clear-thinking and articulate people I’ve ever met and his big mind is held firmly within a very big and awakened heart. —Andrew Cohen, author of Evolutionary Enlightenment
Terry Patten is an incredible spiritual teacher: articulate, possessing amazing depth yet highly accessible, humble, skillful, of the highest integrity, thoroughly grounded in Ken Wilber’s work yet offering an original synthesis that is uniquely his. —Paul McHugh, Minneapolis, MN

Jeff Salzman has worked in adult education and transformation for thirty years. For three years Jeff worked side by side with Ken Wilber developing the Integral Institute, an international center for integral theory and application. Jeff spent the last few years as co-founder and a lead teacher at Boulder Integral (now The Integral Center). These days he travels, teaches and comments about current events on Integral Life and on his blog, The Daily Evolver.

Jeff explains current events better than anyone I know. He always makes me feel better and more hopeful about our world. —Maria Aarons, Denver, Colorado
Ok, here is integral in action. Jeff doesn’t just know integral, he transmits it. I feel like I’m flying at a higher altitude just from being around him. —Brian DiPospero, Los Angeles
The Garrison Keillor of Integral. —Steve McIntosh, author of Integral Consciousness and Evolution’s Purpose

The Conversation So Far

Our monthly community calls are our way to stay connected between gatherings. Each community call leading up to the Integral Living Room gathering will be posted here. Please have a listen to any and all that interest you!

If you haven’t already, sign up to receive your special PIN to join the calls. (We’ll put you on The Integral Living Room mailing list but we won’t spam you or sell your address to anyone else).


Click here to join us and see the schedule of calls. 

Previous Calls

Preparing to Die: An Integral Conversation
Recorded 8.4.2016
Download (right click “Save Link As…”)


An integral relationship to grief and loss
Recorded 5.26.2016
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Death Denial and the Immortality Project
Recorded 3.17.2016
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Spiritual Bypass of the Soul?
Recorded 9.10.2015
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Magical Thinking Vs Real Psychic Phenomena
Recorded 6.25.2015
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A Discussion of Subtle Energy
Recorded 4.9.2015
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Subtle Energy, the Soul & Life Purpose
Recorded 1.22.2015
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View the Call Archive for More


Join us in beautiful Boulder, CO | Nov 11th 7pm to Nov 13th 1pm


Preparing to Die: An Integral Conversation


Hello, My name is Inigo Montoya.
You killed my father.
Prepare to die.
  – The Princess Bride

Preparing to Die: An Integral Conversation Recapped

The next Integral Living Room is coming up soon in Boulder on November 10 – 13, 2016.  The topic of conversation this fall is Life and death; Love and loss.  We have hosted three community calls in preparation for the event so far – the last of which was held on Thursday, August 4.

This call was an exploration of the importance of preparing to die, and it was especially poignant because of the recent death of our good friend and colleague, Brett Andrew Walker. Brett died on June 7, 2016 unexpectedly, and this significant loss made our contemplation all the more vivid, real, and tear-stained.

Most traditions suggest that we acknowledge the fact of death in life: our own certain demise and the eventual death of others. Doing so brings the preciousness of this fleeting human experience into full display.

There is an enormous array of spiritual practices that can help us to be present with others in their dying process, and to prepare for that final moment when we breathe our last. These practices range from disciplined meditation to forgiveness work to imagining the dying process itself in excruciatingly fine detail. There scores of preparatory practices, but in this conversation, we honed in on three: 1) The cultivation of wisdom and virtue in this life, 2) learning to surrender, and 3) meditating on impermanence.

Jeff began by reflecting about a time when he was musing with Ken Wilber about reincarnation. Ken remarked that there is a belief that what survives from one lifetime to the next is the sum total of the wisdom and virtue that we cultivated in this life. Jeff recalled that he and Brett had considered this idea together, and in the wake of Brett’s death, Jeff couldn’t help but wonder how it is going for him now.  Particularly because Brett was such an elegant soul, and had a truly kind, open heart. Did wisdom attend him into another realm, dimension or form of rebirth? Did he take his significant virtue with him? “Does the beauty of Brett continue?” Jeff wondered aloud. Of course, he can’t know, but he allows for the question all the time. It brings home the possibility of living a life more deeply imbued with the good, the true, and the beautiful. And it is commonly known that a well-lived life, especially one imbued with kindness and love is easier to surrender than one filled with confusion, ill will,  and regret.

Terry discussed practicing the art of surrender. He reminded us that all of spiritual practice can be viewed as a rehearsal for death. But it’s not easy to relinquish even small attachments, let alone the entirety of our life. And because the physiological process of dying can be so gritty and painful, and because the utter loss of the ground can be so frightening, we need to practice letting go in while still alive. We must learn to submit before we encounter what may be an excruciating or terrifying experience.

But Terry suggested that with practice, when the moment of dying comes, it may be possible to go into it with a deep willingness, with an ability let go and trust in the complete unknown. As he put it on the call, he wants to be able to meet his own dying moments “heart first.”

He said he imagined a possibility of being drawn through the gross reality to the subtle, to the unmanifest with a kind of “crazy, excruciating bliss,” and surrendering into the mysterious, transcendental conscious heart of existence. Because, he said, surrender is, ultimately, a profound pleasure. It is through our surrender and submission that we are in right relationship to that which is immeasurably greater than ourselves.

Terry offered that our ability to bear the ordinary difficulties of life, to really let go on the meditation cushion, or to be deeply there with another human being, are all rehearsals for this profound surrender of the largest letting go.

Finally, Diane let us through a reflection on impermanence. We recalled an earlier stage of life, remembering what our environment and home were like at that earlier time, who all the people were that surrounded us then, and what the activities were that we used to engage. We remembered what it was like to be ourselves then; what interested and occupied our thoughts. Then we noticed how profoundly everything that has changed in the whole of our life since then that early memory. After that, we moved our minds to remember a later stage in life with the same series of questions, but in a different time frame. And again we recalled how so much has changed.

To conclude the reflection, we noticed the fact that the one constant in our life has been our awareness, that which has experienced the whole of our life. And then we rested in that open state, identified with awareness itself for the final minutes of the meditation. Whether there is something called an afterlife, or whether this light is full extinguished at the moment of death, the practice of awareness prepares us equally for this great unknown.

As an Integral Life practice, Ken Wilber encourages us to deliberately face the reality of death and to engage meditative practice, realizing the timeless, unconditioned dimension of who we are. Familiarity with our vast, unconditioned nature will certainly give us the ability to surrender to this great change when it finally comes.

The Integral Living Room is billed as the “Best conversations of your life.” If you are interested in hearing the entirely of this conversation, including the questions and answers at the end of the call, you can find it at our web page www.integrallivingroom.com

If you would like to plunge into the practice of integral conversation, please join us. As of this writing, there are still a few spaces available but the Living Room always sells out, so if you’re interested please register soon.

An integral relationship to grief and loss

An integral relationship to grief and loss
Recorded 5.26.2016

Download link (right click to save to your computer)

Welcome to the 2nd Integral Living Room Community Call of 2016. Our theme for the Living Room this year is death and dying, and this particular call focuses on grief and loss.

Terry has been plunged into a season of grieving, recently experiencing the deaths of two old friends. Jeff expresses feeling like a student of the subject, very much in touch with all his life-affirming identities, and not so closely in touch with loss and grief. And Diane describes how the sudden deaths of seven friends when she was 17 had initiated her spiritual life, and how several deaths, including the passing of her first student and her father, have made the past few years another season of grieving.

Then we hear from Ken Wilber, who offers some clarifying distinctions, pointing to a transcendental relationship to death and loss, recognizing that our contraction over loss is always related to a limited identity with someone or something that we can release. Thus we can relate to the pain of loss and grief as a pointer to limited identities that we can surrender into a greater freedom.

Ken tells his personal story of an immanent experience—grieving the death of his wife Treya after she lost her battle with breast cancer. He describes two particularly striking moments—hearing the snap of her sudden radical release into consciousness, and spontaneously weeping every afternoon for several months as he re-experienced each stage of a tortuous five years of bad news, medical ordeals, shocks and losses.

But Ken observes that growth only happens through the release of old forms. Even in the face of his profound losses, he expresses amazing confidence that the universe is “winding up, not down”. It needs deaths to grow into higher orders of complexity and consciousness. Diane expresses a deep appreciation for Ken’s way of looking at the world.

This illustrates powerfully how intimacy with death is intimacy with life. Growth always involves letting go of old forms, and that means grief. We tend to emphasize the expansiveness and inclusion of new possibilities that are also a part of growth, but we tend not to emphasize the flip side of the process—the grief of letting go as we outgrow things and leave them behind. It can be our old ways of looking at the world; it can be people; it can even be a profession. Death is a component of growth.

Jeff says that although he had participated in this conversation with Ken some weeks ago, it was like he was hearing it for the first time. He praises what a great teacher Ken is to him. “What a transmission I receive from him, just listening to him. Finding your teacher is a big thing, and Ken is my teacher. After listening to Ken’s perspective I feel more whole-hearted and optimistic.”

Terry resonates particularly with the theme of growth implying leave-taking, and refers to the remarkable integral poem by Hermann Hesse, “Stages”:

As every flower fades and as all youth
Departs, so life at every stage,
So every virtue, so our grasp of truth,
Blooms in its day and may not last forever.
Since life may summon us at every age
Be ready, heart, for parting, new endeavor,
Be ready bravely and without remorse
To find new light that old ties cannot give.
In all beginnings dwells a magic force
For guarding us and helping us to live.
Serenely let us move to distant places
And let no sentiments of home detain us.
The Cosmic Spirit seeks not to restrain us
But lifts us stage by stage to wider spaces.
If we accept a home of our own making,
Familiar habit makes for indolence.
We must prepare for parting and leave-taking
Or else remain the slaves of permanence.

Even the hour of our death may send
Us speeding on to fresh and newer spaces,
And life may summon us to newer races.
So be it, heart: bid farewell without end.

At the end of the call we open up to sharing among many members of the community. One woman shares the ways this conversation confirms her acceptance of her parents’ coming deaths. Another describes how the dwindling of her business is striking her as a tremendous loss, a death of sorts. Another describes how grief opens us up to larger griefs. And another points back to a visit to Shambhala books in Berkeley and an encounter with The Tibetan Book of the Dead, opening up a whole new relationship with death.

As we end the call, we share a resonant laugh, remembering how psychedelic experiences, feeling like death and dissolution, have delivered many of us into a space that’s bigger than our personal identity. We have been stretched by some mystical states into a free space from which we don’t snap all the way back. The laugh we share reminds us of what it feels like to be among fellow integral evolutionaries in the big room when we are all together in Boulder.

There are only about a dozen spaces left, so please register soon if you’d like to join us for the Integral Living Room, Nov 10-13, in Boulder at the Integral Center!


Join us in beautiful Boulder, CO | Nov 10th 7pm to Nov 13th 1pm